It Felt Right at the Time

August 14, 2009 in Conscious Living · Written by Tara Joyce · Follow Me on Twitter

regret

We all make mistakes, we can’t control the fact that we are imperfect. How we react to those mistakes, however, is ours to determine.

Useless regret

It’s easy to look back and chastise your Self for the choices you made — for the words you ’shouldn’t’ have used or the actions you ’shouldn’t’ have taken. We beat our Self up for hurting others, for being misguided in our actions, for being wrong. We wonder how we could have been so stupid and we wish we could go back in time and undo what was done.

What we know now…

What we fail to remember when we regret something is that the realities of today are not the realities of yesterday. What we fail to celebrate is the fact that at the moment when we made the choice it seemed most right and true for our Self.

Don’t doubt your choices. Don’t regret your past.

There are no mistakes. You are exactly where you are meant to be. Don’t doubt your inner voice even when it seems that it has lead you astray. We often learn more from the mistakes than we do the triumphs.

If we don’t accept our past, we will be driven to make choices with our ego rather than our higher Self.  We’ll end up making decisions that will neither support our Self nor anyone else.

So next time you’re wishing you could undo the past focus on what you’ve learned from it and how you’ve grown since then.

photo credit: photine

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  • http://Innerpreneuring.com gulliver

    >There are no mistakes. You are exactly where you are meant to be.

    T, that's bollocks.

    There are loads of mistakes, goofs, errors and unwanted out-of-position situations which can't be attributed to divine occurrence, fate, kismet, whatever.

    And sometimes there's little of benefit to be learned other than… 'experience is the thing which tells you you've made another mistake, again, after you've made it'.

    And such events aren't always a process of growth.

    So how's about we get real? Life is full of fuck-ups, many of which could have been avoided, but so what? You do your best and keep-on keeping on.

  • http://www.elasticmind.ca/innerpreneur Tara Joyce

    We'll have to agree to disagree. We have a choice as to how we want to
    look at “mistakes, goofs, errors and unwanted out-of-position
    situations” and I choose never see them as such. If you learn from
    something, how is it a mistake? Sure you could have avoided it but you
    didn't so why focus on that? Learn from it. Understand why you made
    that choice and grow from it. Or sit and stew about it. It's your
    choice. Just as it's mine to believe there are no mistakes.

  • anthonymci

    I suppose I'd never thought about it, but context is so important when looking at past actions. I love your point about how it 'seemed right at the time'. I suppose it's just a matter of trying to make sure you realise that though it seemed right, in reality it turned out to be not so, and to try and take something from this for next time.

  • http://www.elasticmind.ca/innerpreneur Tara Joyce

    Exactly, Anthony — it's okay that we are imperfect and make choices that aren't always the best. That is being human. What is so important though is how you look at those choices in retrospect. You may as well learn from the experience, rather than hold it against yourself. To me the only mistake you can make is wasting your time with regret.

  • Ann Behnke

    Very well put Tara. It's funny because I was thinking about this last night & per chance decided to log onto your web-blog, and here you go. Thanks for the encouraging words “There are no mistakes”. Although some would beg to differ, but it is how we learn and grow. As you mention “You are exactly where you are meant to be.”, has really helped to hit home and make me realize that I am who I am because of my choices in life. That inner voice (what ever you want to call it) is there for a reason, to guide you & if per chance you choose to not listen again another reason to learn from. Thanks for your inspiring words. Take Care, Ann

  • http://www.elasticmind.ca/innerpreneur Tara Joyce

    “That inner voice (what ever you want to call it) is there for a reason, to guide you & if per chance you choose to not listen again another reason to learn from.” Ann, nicely put your Self. I find those words inspiring.

    love you.