It’s Not What Happens, It’s How You Handle It
Life happens… Things you can’t control… People you can’t avoid… Stuff happens just beyond your reach, and it affects you.
I used to think it was my responsibility to control the things that happened in Life. I strived to minimize the bad and to maximize the good. I watched and I stood prepared. I let in only what passed my vigorous tests.
As Life continued, and continued to happen, I began to see the illusion of control I felt I had. Despite my best efforts, I could not manage and shape Life into being exactly as I wanted it to be. I could not make it more convenient for me.
This left me considering, perhaps I’d been misunderstanding my job. Perhaps, it wasn’t my job to control Life. Perhaps instead, it was my job to manage how I handled it. Perhaps, it’s not what’s happening that matters, but rather how I’m handling it.
I can’t stop Life from happening but I can work to know, and trust, I’m handling Life as best I can. In working on this confidence, I receive clarity around what I am truly responsible to in Life — to myself and to you. I must handle you and I, and what happens between us, with care. I must handle Life and all it brings (the good, the bad, and the in-between) with respect, and with honesty.
Handling things as best I can, however, does not necessarily mean you will recognize this. You may not see the truth of my actions and you may not mirror this back to me. You may feel I’m not doing a good enough job handling things. When this is the case, it’s time again for me to practice my confidence, checking in with my Self and determining if I’m handling things as best I can, and if so, continuing to. The truth of my actions will reveal itself.
No matter what comes my way, Life only provides me with what I can handle. In doing my best with these circumstances, I free myself from the chaos of Life’s happenings.
photo credit: Ias