Emotional Self-Abandonment

Emotional Self-Abandonment

photo credit: gingher

We, as humans, have a tendency to use our mind to negate our emotions. We use our mind as a tool to abandon how we feel.

I know, personally, I often use my mind to abandon my negative feelings, especially when they are directed at someone I love. In these moments, I’d rather pretend the feelings aren’t there… than explore why they are. The result of doing this, of locking up my sensitives in my logical mind, is that I disown my feelings and my emotional needs.

For some of us, we negate our feelings or emotional needs because we feel the expression of them is dangerous. Our emotions feel too vulnerable and the sharing of them feels to risky. Rightfully, risks are present when we share our most vulnerable self — but hiding our feelings from others is far more dangerous. For it leads us to mask our feelings, not only for others, but from our self. Rather than feel what we feel, we learn to abandon ourselves emotionally. We learn to negate what we feel and to lock it up in our mind. This lack of emotional self-awareness, and this mental overemphasis, further disconnects us from our self — and others.

We owe it to our emotional self to break our cycle of self-abandonment.

Emotional self-abandonment may feel safer — but it is no less painful than our own emotional truth — and it is all the more detrimental. For in not being present to our selves, we become slightly lost.

However, by acknowledging our logical desire to negate our feelings, we begin to break this cycle. Simply in seeing our abandonment, we cease our pattern of turning our back on our feelings. For recognizing our neglect enables us to be present to our emotional self once again, and within this awareness, we find we no longer need to leave any part of ourselves out again.

photo credit: gingher

Saying No

Saying No


It’s hard for me to say No sometimes.

Sometimes it feels like I can’t just say it, even though I need to.

It feels wrong.

It feels like it’s not an option.

Despite what I feel, the problem isn’t that I want to say No, it’s me deciding it’s wrong to say No.

When I feel it is wrong to say, my communication ends up reflecting this.

I become unclear, and/or rejecting, and our connection suffers as a result.

But, when I stay in a place where I feel there is no problem in saying No, my communication feels all the more open — to me and the person I am connecting with.

By acknowledging and working with my resistance to saying No, I am able to practice staying light and responding clearly with why no is my answer, without remorse.

I can feel that I am respecting the person I’m communicating with, AND respecting myself as the same time.

I am respecting myself enough to say No when I mean it, and I am respecting you enough not to say Yes when I don’t.

I am me, I trust me and I know what’s best for me. This is what I am acting on and this is what I can feel good communicating.

No matter how you choose to respond.

photo credit: fotogail