by Tara Joyce | Sep 23, 2016 | Cultural Creativity, Self/Business Growth
Our true nature, who we inherently are, is expressed in all that we do. Yet most of us live without an awareness of this truth, and the practice of expressing who we naturally are becomes difficult to realize.
Instead, we find our selves striving, pushing, giving up; actions driven by our confusion over who we naturally are.
When we express our true nature, we are human beings — we are what we are. When we do not express our nature, we don’t know what we are. We are confused. Deluded.
We don’t know what to call ourselves. In our minds, we are something else other than what we are. We do not exist. We’re ghosts of our self.
We live in this ghost-like state, our true nature eluding us, until we find the courage to know our self (again). Open to being what we are, our true nature resumes itself.
We are found once again, through our own awareness of our self. Now, we know the true value of allowing ourselves to be what we inherently are.
photo credit: Laurent Henschen
by Tara Joyce | Jul 19, 2016 | Self/Business Growth
To see only yourself in every reflection, and only the parts you want to see, a life is lived in the shallow end. Where there is deepness and darkness, you do not probe, unwilling to go deeper. Uncomfortable with its truth, you reject and dismiss that which you care not to understand.
To be shallow is to only see—and believe in—the surface facade of others, and of yourself. This shiny surface is so alluring when the darker, less “perfect” aspects of yourself are unacceptable. You live on the surface, so that life’s deeper truths and anyone who expresses them, can easily be rejected.
To dip below the surface is supremely threatening, for to acknowledge the depth possible is to accept the imperfect life we each bear. Dipping below your own facade, your own shiny surface, to acknowledge and accept your own imperfections is more than your shallow heart will currently bear.
Instead, it is easier to see that “other” people have issues, that there is something supremely “wrong” with them. It is easier to point fingers and to place blame. It is easier to not understand and to judge. Resolved of responsibility, comfortable in the shallow end, you do not see the deeper, darker truth of yourself hidden in plain sight. Everyone in your life is a mirror reflecting back the parts you love and dislike about yourself. Those which provoke you and numb you, those which drive you to turn away and to hide from your darkness, are the very reflections you can learn the most from.
photo credit: stttjin
by Tara Joyce | Jun 1, 2016 | My Journey | What's On My Mind
So good at the act that you forget what’s true.
So good at pretending that the unreal becomes real.
What you feel is under your control.
You can simply act it away.
A mask of neutrality.
Leads you to believe you might actually feel it.
You can ignore your feelings.
You can act forever.
Yet at some point, the inevitable curtain comes down, and the performance ends.
You are left with you; and the feelings you’re pretending aren’t there.
If only for a moment.
The act is over.
What then?
Who are you when your truth has space to be?
The question, terrifying.
Its answer even more so.
It lies in love and the shape of it.
What does your love and care look like when there is no performance to mask it?
photo credit: Ania
by Tara Joyce | Mar 4, 2014 | Cultural Creativity
It is a way of being that prevents connection.
It is presenting a false story about myself and my life in order to control others perception of me.
It’s a form of marketing or more specifically advertising, and it’s neither mindful nor empowering.
While in my pretense, I’m not valuing my contributions fully nor am I fully valuing the contributions others.
I am not being honest about who I am. I am determining certain elements of me are better and more desirable.
How does it feel to hide parts of myself?
My pretense is like my own beer commercial where I see blondes in bikinis drinking delicious beer, having fun and playing volleyball with awesome dudes.
Everything looks perfect, I’m trying hard to show you that it’s perfect, and I’m displaying my finest acting and contortionism so you don’t see the sand in my bum and the dimples in my thighs.
Does the need for pretense grow with the acquisition of power?
Probably not. But the acquisition of power does make it easier to hide and pretend.
But why do I hide and pretend? Is it about my relationship with power?
What am I communicating when I do pretend?
I am expressing that I need to try and control perceptions of me. Yours and mine. It’s about my power.
I need to appear more or less perfect than I already am.
Why am I not enough?
photo credit: SalFalko
by Tara Joyce | Apr 20, 2013 | Personal Branding
There is no demand for my message.
Personal branding isn’t about packaging myself up into a pretty box and showing only the good and glowing. The whole me, not my tidy little message, is what people want and will see, whether I attempt to control it or not.
Establishing a message for myself, deciding on a pretense, trying to make you think what I want you to think about me, is not of benefit to me. And it’s not of interest to you. You don’t care about what I want to pretend to be.
My personal brand, it is my Marketing, and it’s not something I do to you. Marketing is something I do with you. It’s about creating great conversations.
That’s what’s really in demand. Connection.
My message, my pretense, can only prevent me from reaching that place with you.
