After a year and a half of writing this blog, it still seems odd to me that I share my most personal thoughts with world. See, I’ve always considered myself a private person, as I keep my feelings close to my chest, dealing them out only to those few, dear people closest to me. I’ve never really felt safe opening up to people, and I felt a sense of contentment with my story staying mine, alone.
You actually care?
When I first heard about blogging I couldn’t understand why anyone:
- Would think someone else cares enough about their thoughts to publish them
- Would want to read some random person’s thoughts
My reaction made perfect sense as I held the belief that an average person (like me) had no business broadcasting their thoughts, as they were insignificant, trivial and without value. I couldn’t imagine what kind of whackjob would actually care what I had to say.
The web is personal, so I better be
I still struggle with this idea. Being open doesn’t come that naturally to me. In fact, when I first decided to write this blog, I thought I would write it under a pseudonym, like J.D. Salinger. I didn’t want you to know it was me. Then I came to understand that the web is a table for two, and that the connection I have with you is only made possible by sharing my Self and my story. Without it, I have no voice, and, duh, my voice is my greatest tool. Whether I like it or not, this blog is about me. And I need to get comfortable with that.
When I write now, I often need to remind myself to be more personal. I still work to silence the little fearful voice that screams “no one cares”.
Sit down and stay a while
What I’ve found so freeing about becoming more public is that in this little corner of the web, at the table I’ve set up, I draw people like you, and you have helped me create an environment where I feel safe to open up entirely and let my voice sing.
photo by: numstead
