Rise of the Innerpreneur

Perceived Value Pricing

Exploring Our Money Shadow

This is an excerpt from my upcoming book from Integral Publishers, Pay What It’s Worth: You Don’t Need to Set a Price on Value. Stay updated on when it’s available for purchase here.

Money is a symbol of two basic principles that underlie every process in the physical world: the principle of value, and the principle of giving and receiving. Whether it is our money, our labor, our commitment, or our care—we estimate the value of something by what we are willing to give for it and receive from it. This respect and attention we give to what we value, and how we value it, is a reflection of our self-worth. The lack of respect we give to the things that matter to us—including our bodies and the worth of our labor—is also a reflection of our self-worth. This unconscious lack of respect is our shadow energy around money and self-worth, and commonly manifests itself as the emotions of fear and greed, which are closely tied to our modern relationship with money and wealth. The corruption, materialism, and consumerism of modern society, and the widely disproportionate difference in wealth between the people at the top of the income ladder and the rest of society are all manifestations of our collective money shadow.

Unaware of our personal shadow energy, we have “bought into” the idea that if we can afford an item, it must measure and reflect the inherent value we hold—and if another cannot, they must be worth less and hold less value than we do. Disconnected from our own and others’ true sense of worth, we are losing our intuitive sense of how much to give for the value we receive. Instead, we are building ourselves up with material accumulations, as though they alone are a reflection of our worth and deservedness. What our money shadow does not recognize however is that money is only one type of currency, one type of wealth, and it is not a true measure of our self-worth. Perceiving money as the only and/or most important measure of wealth and self-worth can only leave us feeling unsatisfied. There will always be someone with more money, and thus there will always be someone for us to feel less than. While several psychological studies have revealed that although material security definitely increases our happiness, beyond a certain income level this correlation between income and happiness drops significantly. One reason for this is that a major ingredient of happiness is a sense of sufficiency—of having enough. In a culture where we are trained to consume and to compete and compare, many of us have lost the ability to recognize this feeling of satisfaction. We find ourselves feeling we do not have enough, that we are in lack, and these feelings further trigger our shadow emotions of fear and greed. We find ourselves feeling that we are not enough.

While we may not objectively live in poverty, in essence, our culture lives with a poverty consciousness. Attached to material goods as a symbol of our self-worth, we are now better equipped to feel in lack—to feel we do not have enough and are not enough—than to feel satisfied. This lack of satisfaction, this poverty consciousness, is extremely painful and often manifests in mental habits like criticism, judgment, envy, and anger. Unaware of the pain we are in, and unable to recognize a feeling of satisfaction within our self, we unconsciously invest in scarcity—we acquire for the sake of having more and more, further losing our ability to access our inner feeling of “enough.” Lost in our greed, we endlessly chase the ever-receding prize that is our happiness.

It is not easy to feel whole and satisfied in a collective culture that sells you on your insufficiency. It requires cultivating a conscious awareness of how you behave and how you think. It involves actively looking at your attitudes and imbalances around money, authority, and health. There is a balance to be found between greed and generosity, between trusting in abundance and buying into scarcity. A healthy relationship with physical wealth can be cultivated within yourself.

photo credit: Jimi Filipovski

Hello! I’m Tara, a wizard of less obvious things. I love hearing from you, so please feel free to connect with me.

I deeply appreciate your support of my work—through allowing it to grow in your imagination, through sharing it with others, and through your financial support.

Everything Has The Same Value

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Everyone can be your teacher, and everything can be an object of worship.

When you can free yourself from the scales of judgement in your lower mind—where one thing is held in higher virtue than another—in your higher mind, everything has the same value.

In this space, you see the teacher learns from their student, as the student learns from their teacher. In every exchange and in every relationship, there is value to realize.

When you can accept yourself and your true nature, you see this shared value. In acceptance of yourself, you lose the need to rank and weigh, and to judge any thing and any one as better or worse.

In this space of equanimity, you understand you create the value you give, and the value you receive.

What’s curious is that in this effort to understand our world and improve our self, we allow ourselves to realize the infinite value we possess.

photo credit: DorkyMum

Hello! I’m Tara, a wizard of less obvious things. I love hearing from you, so please feel free to connect with me.

I deeply appreciate your support of my work—through allowing it to grow in your imagination, through sharing it with others, and through your financial support.

Sharing the Responsibility of Not Setting Prices

InvestInSharing

Recently, there was an interesting experiment conducted in not setting prices and charitable giving, by UC San Diego Rady School of Management and Disney Research. Conducting their experiment at a popular roller coaster, using post-roller coaster action photos as the item to be valued, they found not setting prices to be a viable pricing strategy and social responsibility strategy for companies–when the customer’s willingness to give is stimulated.

While the study focuses on stimulating generosity in a charitable setting, the study’s findings can be applied to any relationship and experience-based business. The researchers found when a customer feels more connected to what they are giving to—and in choice about what/how much they are giving—the more willing they are to give. When buyers know their money and generosity will benefit something specific, such as a charity, or someone specific, such as the business owner, they feel a more tangible and human connection to the value their giving is creating, and in turn, the more open they are to giving—and giving generously.

The study concluded not setting prices could be a tool for creating opportunities for “shared social responsibility” and this shared responsibility may provide the critical sustainability component that is often lacking in current social responsibility strategies. Fascinating.

photographed in my hometown of Toronto by Toban B.

Hello! I’m Tara, a wizard of less obvious things. I love hearing from you, so please feel free to connect with me.

I deeply appreciate your support of my work—through allowing it to grow in your imagination, through sharing it with others, and through your financial support.

The Heart of Self-Worth

heartworth

“Thoughts become things,” Mike Dooley says. You don’t get what you deserve, you get what you think you deserve.

Life provides your perceived worth, not your actual worth. Only when you connect with your intrinsic goodness — your courage and your kindness — do you allow, and feel you deserve, all of life’s blessings. Only then, can you truly get what you deserve. For only then, do you trust in your unconditional worth.

Unconditional worth belongs to you. It’s always been yours. It’s inherently yours. Your self-worth can not be earned. It can not be measured. It is simply yours to know, and to grow with.

Yet what you think your worth matters just as much as the truth of your infinite value. Feelings need to find balance with perceptions. To truly know your worth and receive it, you need to find alignment with your perceptions and expressions of worth, and your actual worth.

Your thoughts are becoming things, and they’re showing you the truth of your feelings. Life’s giving you what you think you deserve. Are you happy with what you’re creating? Whatever your answer, your worth is yours to grow into, and yours to create the life you truly deserve.

photo credit: eva blue

Hello! I’m Tara, a wizard of less obvious things. I love hearing from you, so please feel free to connect with me.

I deeply appreciate your support of my work—through allowing it to grow in your imagination, through sharing it with others, and through your financial support.

A Taker’s Approach

photo credit: Heleri

When I share I practice with Pay What It’s Worth pricing, I often receive one of three perspectives: The Giver loves it and is intrigued by it; the Matcher is curious, has questions, and wants to know more; and the Taker gets angry.

It is the Taker’s perspective, for me, that’s absolutely fascinating and holds a wealth of information… Perhaps more so than the people and perspectives who are open to the idea.

Being taken from hurts. Being a Taker hurts too.

The Taker’s perspective tells so much about the human condition, and how we as individuals process and express our collective feelings of separation and of lack. The Taker is extremely victimized by their feelings of lack, and they’re not yet capable of constructively processing them. The Taker lives within each of us — we experience it in the places in our life where we have, in fear, not yet owned our responsibility. It’s more than we’re capable of handling in the moment.

In the context of money and pricing, the Taker thinks and feels it’s stupid to not set prices. Their perspective is: humans are inherently not fair, nor generous. The Taker challenges the validity of, the sustainability of, and the authenticity of not setting prices, and they challenge my own authenticity as a seller, for choosing it.

The Taker does not believe I could be truly be happy with what they give, nor will I feel it’s fair. This perspective perfectly reflects their own story about relationships, and more specifically about money and finances, and it justifies their own actions in relationship. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy, really. They ‘know’ they won’t be fair, and so they question how I could possibly be happy with what they give. In not being capable of fairness or balance in their own relationships, they project this lack onto me, and everyone else.

Engaging in emotional jeopardy.

The Taker, rather than look at their own feelings, thoughts, and actions, instead looks elsewhere, at something external; such as at me and my offerings. Rather than observe their own intentions and actions in relationship, they look for the inevitable holes in mine. When allowed, they use this vulnerable space to show their Ego that others take in the same way they do. When given the freedom, the Taker uses this space to justify their behaviour and to feel victimized by the relationship — either by assuming they must take more than is fair in order to survive, and/or by feeling that they haven’t received enough.

The Taker is not yet capable of investing in fair exchanges and balanced relationships. They lack boundaries and a sense of responsibility. And when allowed by others, like me, they will unconsciously use their exchanges and relationships as a mirror to confirm what they already ‘know’.

The Taker’s immense value.

In recognizing the importance of the Taker’s perspective, I’m being emotionally self-protective. In being self-protective, I’m enabling myself to remain emotionally self-aware and self-nurturing without being hurt or taken advantage of by others. In caring for myself in this way, I’m simultaneously supporting the Taker in re-writing their story. For I’m not engaging in the drama of their Taking, perpetuating it and co-creating it. In remaining attentive to the person, and their drive to Take, and interacting with them in realistic ways, I’m not putting myself in emotional jeopardy. I’m co-creating healthy relationships, and I’m supporting the Taker in their healing and recovery.

Creating the balance you need.

The Taker has the powerful ability to show you where your boundaries need to be strengthened and transformed, to ensure you are truly creating relationships of mutual fulfillment. Interacting with your Taker will guide you in creating the balance your relationships need.

photo credit: Heleri

Hello! I’m Tara, a wizard of less obvious things. I love hearing from you, so please feel free to connect with me.

I deeply appreciate your support of my work—through allowing it to grow in your imagination, through sharing it with others, and through your financial support.