When you are allowed to decide what to pay for an exchange, you will base your decision on four factors.
It is my theory that these four factors correlate with Integral Theory that there are Four Doors of Perception, known as AQAL, through which we all see the world.
I used to be “on call”. Any time you “suddenly” needed me, I was there.
I used to think I was making things better for you by “fixing” them.
I used to use you to make myself feel useful.
I like being seen as a “great” and “caring” person. I do not like how tapped out I feel as a result.
I do not like how I couldn’t claim the time or energy I needed as safely my own.
Each time I put my life and my plans on hold to accommodate you, I was quieting my voice. Each time I ran to rescue you, I was abusing my creative energy by allowing you to dine freely on my time, talent and energy.
And it made me angry – at you – but mostly at myself.
This is the fourth installment of Christine and my monthly Peer-to-Peer Mentoring series. On her blog, I answered her question:
“You’re a multi-talented lady, and I fancy myself the same. You’re baking a number of very interesting pies at the moment. How do you ensure each pie (i.e., each interest/passion/business/avenue of expression) gets adequate attention? How do you make the time for everything you do and still do your best? I am in a constant struggle with making more time for my writing… and, less imperatively, my cross-stitching, and I want to learn from your ability to manage multiple interests.”
Great question, one I’m constantly re-visiting in my own work! But wait, you didn’t get an intern yet so you can go out joy-riding? Just kidding…
Entrepreneurship is about transformation, flexibility and openness to try new things. Multi-talented business persons are great at creating activities and projects, but sometimes develop a tendency to become over-committed. Despite this, as talented as you are at creating projects, so are you smart enough to create time for your cross-stitching my multi-talented friend!
From the moment we are born we are shaped by the expectation of others.
Their assumptions weigh us down. They sit like a backpack, heavy on our shoulder. Sometimes invisible to us.
These ideas about us are not ours, but we can hold onto them as though they are.
We need to be conscious of what people ask of us, and what they reward us for being.
I’ve learned something about myself. I have performance anxiety.
It cripples me. It makes me freeze.
When it envelopes me, it blocks me from seeing the whole. It’s hard to see out of it. All I can see is through it.
I’ve had it since childhood, but before now, I hadn’t seen it for what it was. Even thought she’s been right beside me for so long.
My negativity, the voice in my head, she is ANXIETY. FEAR. JUDGEMENT. over what I am. Before I thought she was helpful, saving me from my own embarrassment. But now I see that she acts better than me, in attempt to keep me down. She needs to feel better than all the shit I create.
Hi there, I’m Tara Joyce.
Unfulfilled at 26, I decided to start my own business to explore how I could be of service. Quickly, I was attracted to the seemingly backwards strategy of not setting a price and to allowing my customers to determine the value of my offering. Today, my “Pay What It’s Worth” concept supports people globally in exploring their own fear-based ideas around money, value, and business relationships.
