Hanging my success on outcomes
I have a hard time not focusing on the end product of my writing. I often think about its outcome — an outcome that I have determined as the hallmark for my success as a writer — publication.
But wait, don’t I publish already? Of course I do, but it is on my own accord, and for some reason I have told my Self that my writing is only as good as the literary professionals who want to publish it. Only when I have a book published with my name on it will I truly be a writer.
I’m giving away my power
I’m attaching my personal success or failure to the outcome of publication, thus setting my Self up to be continually looking into the future and judging my present actions against this idealized outcome.
Writing because I want to
Sure, I want to communicate with others. And sure, I want to connect but the reality is before I created Rise of the Innerpreneur as avenue for me to do this, I still wrote alone in my room, for no reason other than that is what I needed to do.
I’m growing to understand that our art – whatever it may be – is not a task to be accomplished, it is a relationship to nurtured and cultivated throughout our lives. And this idea is especially important to grasp – process over product – when your art is your career.
Practicing for the love of it
My energy is best channeled into the consistent practice of writing rather than constant seeking into where the act and the art will take me. It is what I do now that will allow me to have the future I seek.
I’ve realized it’s okay if the goal of publication gets me in the chair and writing, but once I’m there, if I don’t let go of the goal, it can only hold me back. I need to just be with the work. I need to keep it free from expectations.
Managing my desires
I’m learning to manage my desire to be published – to identify and accept that it is there, understand how it drives me and then let it go.
It’s there to keep me showing up, nothing more. But that in itself will take me to places I never thought possible.
photo credit: soartsyithurts