Rise of the Innerpreneur

Emotional Littering

EmotionalLittering

Emotional littering is when I attempt to alleviate my own overwhelming emotions by disposing of them elsewhere, when I inherently know they’re mine to be responsible to.

In those moments, I don’t want to own what I’m feeling and how I’m reacting to it. Instead, I’m trying to drop my responsibility into another’s backyard. To put it on them.

I’m not making space for my stuff, and I’m attempting to alleviate this by leaving it for someone else to take care of. I’m pretending to not be attached to what I’m feeling.

I am emotionally littering. And in doing so—in not being responsible to how I feel—I’m giving away my power to feel differently. What a waste.

photo credit: Steven Pisano

Defining Boundaries

Container

A plant needs space, and a seed, as its container to grow. The seed is a boundary from which the plant grows, as is the space that it takes root and grows in.

To ensure our plants—the ones we choose to nurture and grow—have the space they need to grow free from invasive intruders, we weed our landscape.

Our relationships are no different. They are a landscape that needs our attention.

Weeding is necessary, as is protecting our space from the things we do not need, nor want, within it.

Defining our boundaries in this way is not as a fear-based act of protection, but rather a necessary and abundance-ensuring act that supports the growth of what we care about nurturing.

Everything living needs boundaries to build strong foundations from. What grows from us is no different.

Our boundaries nurture what we care to come to fruition.

photo credit: Enid Martindale

Getting to Know Your Garbage

Garbage

Here’s a bit of my garbage… I have a tendency to attach to other people’s garbage.

I magnetize to the parts of people that they have decided have no value and have thrown away.

I can’t stand how their not responsible to these parts, and I determine someone needs to be.

And now their garbage has become mine. I’ve attached to it.

Except, I have my own garbage to manage. So, why do I think I have room to take on theirs? Being responsible to theirs, I can’t fully be responsible to mine.

I need the emotional space.

Other times with garbage, I like to think other people are responsible for the garbage in my life. I like to think I’m a victim of their littering and ignorance, their garbage creations.

When I’m not being responsible to the garbage in my life, when I’m blaming it on others, this action holds me back from being the complete person I am.

Taking responsibility for both the things I’ve made and the things I’ve wasted—my creations and my garbage—I change myself, and the world around me.

In owning my complete experience, I am free to be whole in my tragedy and in my joy. I can now acknowledge both my waste and my creations without shame.

In creating space for own my handiwork, both its darkness and light, I create space for others to own theirs. Magically, my garbage problem disappears.

photo credit: habeebee

William Charlton: Innerpreneur Spotlight

WilliamCharlton

WILLIAM CHARLTON

Founder of Premier Crew

I am:

Concerned about the direction the world is going. We are relying on models of behaviour that are no longer fit for our actual situation. The paternalistic, top-down, command and control, growth centric, use and throw away, win or lose, ways of behaving are creating more problems that they are solving. Inequalities of all sorts are growing and big changes are needed or our future does not look pretty. My aim is to help organisations adapt to the changing eco(nomic)system and to survive and prosper.

My passion is for:

Finding different ways of operating that harness the better (compassionate, empathetic, fairer and more long-sighted) side of our natures and which result in healthier, sustainable (in the wider sense) outcomes.

Which can be summed up as “Helping organisations build honest, fruitful relationships.”

My business helps you:

See the, often questionable, logic behind the dominant methodologies and find ways to do things that better fit the way we humans actually are and the realities of today’s world. By first identifying an organisation’s true purpose and then finding the most efficient ways of achieving that purpose – in a way that sustains both the organisation and the “stakeholder’s” interests. This all sounds very New-Age but without a clear purpose an organisation is truly not coherent.

Stakeholders include anyone affected by the organisation and its work, but the most important are those most impacted by what the organisation does and the way it does it – this is very often the employees – and then working on out, to the other groups that are affected or involved, including the less obvious ones.

My biggest challenge is:

Getting people to see beyond the “Conventional Wisdom” and to believe that change is possible, it can be very positive and can also be great fun.

I make a difference by:

Providing examples of different ways to think, organise and move forward.

I do a lot, and I mean a lot, of research, which is a hugely important aspect of understanding the wider picture. Sometimes I have to dig quite deeply to find reasons and causes, but they are there.

I have lots of ideas about:

Why we do things the way we do. The historical and cultural norms which we might think are immutable are, in the main, quite recent inventions.

Most people can see the problems, but they expect someone else – or technology – to solve them, and then we can carry on as before. I don’t believe we can afford to remain ignorant any longer, we must educate ourselves and adapt.

I have a model, which I call the Three Pillars of Wisdom. These are (to me) the three main aspects where we need to change. The first is the way we operate, especially but not exclusively, at work and our preparation for work (education): We have to change the methods and relationship models to meet peoples’ real needs. There are some excellent methodologies out there (Teal, Holacracy, Beyond Engagement and so on). Second is the economy: The cyclical boom and bust, growth-based model has failed and we urgently need to replace it with something like a Steady-State Model. And lastly: The way we produce and consume has a limited useful life expectancy, which, as we deplete our resources, is nearing its end. The only viable answer is some form of Circular Economy or Cradle-to-Cradle model.

There are of course many other issues in the world but these are the most tractable. Many of the other points of failure will, I believe, start to work or at least improve if we can sort these three areas out.
I’m also a big believer in collaboration, even if it sometimes seems like herding cats – the clue there is to not even consider herding as a methodology.

I’ve learned:

Nothing is quite what it seems and I too can be fooled into thinking that the old ways are best. However, I can also be fooled into thinking that all the old ways are wrong too. Stay alert, question everything – including oneself – seek the underlying, logical explanations and know that just because a problem is big, doesn’t mean it cannot be addressed.

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.” Margaret Mead

I have also learnt a simple truth; that many problems are much clearer when examined under that spotlight called honesty and the most profound insights come at the oddest times.

A favourite quote of mine:

Anyone who believes exponential growth can go on forever in a finite world is either a madman or an economist” – The economist, Kenneth Boulding

But also, I love;

Please accept my resignation. I don’t want to belong to any club that will accept people like me as a member” – Groucho Mark

If you would you like to be considered for an upcoming “Innerpreneur Spotlight”, please feel free to contact me.

All the People We Leave Behind

Left Behind

I need to talk more about all the people I’ve left behind. We need to talk about them more.

We talk of the relationships we have, and the ones we desire—but we don’t talk often enough about the many more people we’ve met and have not moved forward with. We don’t talk enough about all the people we leave behind.

I want us to talk about them more. I want us to talk about what we leave in the past, and how it changes over time. I want us to talk about what remains for us. And what (and who) does not. I want us to understand the relics of our past, and their value to us today.

I believe there is much to learn from the people I have not taken with me, the relationships I have not sustained. Whatever happened between us, I understand to move forward fully, making space for my future and the relationships it holds, it is necessary to more fully honour you—and all whom I’ve left behind.

photo credit: Spiderdama

P.S., I love this recent interview I did with The Entrepreneur’s Radio Show, about how we can best serve each others unique challenges (and more). You can listen here. Enjoy!